Belonging to a patriarchal male dominated Indian society, I dared to step into a field of medicine where a female doctor is looked upon as an absolute misfit. I hail from the state of Punjab, where the usual addressing to a female doctor is that of “sister” (the word denoting nurse), hence awarding the precious pre-fix of “Dr.” exclusively to the male counterparts. The journey of becoming an ER Physician begun with my 3 years of training in Emergency Medicine in a tertiary care hospital in New Delhi. Having finished residency training, I returned to my home state to begin with the real challenges of practicing as an independent Emergency Physician in the new job.
This ride turned into a taxing one as I delivered twin sons and faced a long draining battle of legal separation with my husband. With no extended sympathy benefits, I successfully cleared the MRCEM(RCEM-UK) exams in my first attempt along with working and arduous court visits. The relentless support rendered by my parents in raising the twin boys stands preciously indebted with in my life. Taking the bold step of dissociating from an unworthy marriage was not only condemned by the society but was also topped with endless expert judgements at job sphere.
Being young, petite, short heighted and fair complexioned, I was welcomed by the previously existing colleagues and hospital administrators with a harsh quote; “Oh, why did you join ER? That’s a place for male doctors. Females do not work in such highly volatile and tough zones!” Used to the gender bias in our country, I smiled and took this with a pinch of salt amongst the countless other taunts and opinions.
Not having grey hair and being a woman, became a crime at the workplace. There was a painful initial distrust and absence of acknowledgment from the cross specialties during communication regarding patients’ clinical details. An additional reinforcement/second talk with the “male” doctor on duty was sought by the consultants. However, I kept perseverance and persistence. Detailed patient assessment, crisp EKG interpretations, identification and correction of acid-base disorders swiftly in ED, timely resuscitations, difficult intubations, central line insertions, excellent documentation and sincere effort to gel with the existing old male medical officers started bearing its fruits. However, this was just the beginning, hurdles were manifold. As we all know, or don’t we? The mountainous male EGO – often the root cause of disastrous self assumptions, pent up frustrations, anger, annoyance and a baseless global dislike towards the female counterparts, not to forget dangerous one-sided love obsessions especially targeted towards the “single woman” group!
Besides proving my worth clinically, I had to cater to the careful art of handling this bane of male ego! Not surprisingly, I face the same from male nurses and ground duty assistants, who recognize and abide by all pleasant/unpleasant orders, reprimanding and pampering benefits coming from male colleagues but looked down upon and even amounting to resistance when it stems from me. There seems to be an ongoing chorus in the background in the form of regular opting for or searching for a male doctor in the ED by the patients and attendants, with complete conviction that the female in blue scrubs must be a nurse or assistant or junior doctor. Staring, commenting upon self declared competency skills and teasing are the only icings on the cake in a society which dwells on the age old conception that a woman is designed to cook in kitchen and bear children and it is the male who will earn the bread and get exposed to the outer world.
My gradual transformation into a mature, patient and tough EP has made me the In-charge of the busiest ED of a tertiary care hospital of the region. Male doctors, quite senior to me by age, but lacking adequate specialist degrees in emergency medicine report to me and I enjoy a great camaraderie with them, obviously admixed with few jealous souls. The best attitude change which I gifted myself has been the technique of IGNORANCE (being updated and aware of everything but filtration and ignorance for un-necessary inputs).
As I talk of ignorance, this might seem to be a little word, but it does carry a huge in-depth impact on my day to day life and functioning in the society. I have gradually begun the art of conscious percolation of numerous comments, advices and discouraging taunts coming to me. This pertains to both personal and professional lives. Being at a senior level in a branch which has not yet been very well accepted and developed in India compared to the west, a continuous amount of non-sense administrative issues erupt on a daily basis. This not only distracts you from your useful clinical output on floors, but also tends to drain you mentally. However, ignoring the same has helped me to deliver more efficiently on floor and focus intensely on fruitful endeavors. The entire package of a regressive thinking with respect to women in the Indian society, coupled with a divorced status and leading a department in a peripheral area for a novice specialty, walks with me hand in hand now. But to be able to deliver my best, progress, do justice to my roles (personally and professionally), I have chosen the fine art of maintaining calm and moving ahead on my dream path with perseverance. Complete trust in my being, focused hard work and a conviction towards “No Demotivation” has kept my identity intact. As penned down by Robert Frost, “And miles to go before I sleep…!”
Way to go, Dr. Tandon! Thank you for paving the way for aspiring women EM providers in India. Cheering you on from Denver!
Best wishes,
Smitha Bhaumik
Thank you so much. ????????????????
Dr. Tandon, your experience in Punjab was not unlike my experience working as an ER resident in New York 50 years ago. You were a trailblazer and blazing trails is never easy. I hope you are proud of yourself for what you have accomplished and that your career struggles have been mitigated by the love of your family and friends, and the respect that I bet you now have from some of those big egos (little boys under it all!)
Bravo! Very well done for persevering in a tough work environment!!!
Thank you for such a heartfelt, sincere and enlightening account of what it is like to be a woman in a male dominated field in a patriarchal society. While the West has come far, it is still not 100% gender neutral in role assignment and traditional values persist, in minds and attitudes if not in policy and law. That takes much longer to change. Thank you for your exposé of persistent attitudes. Even in the enlightened West such issues persist and, I’m afraid, will for some time. It generally takes three generations to change a society’s attitude to a social… Read more »
Bravo for you! I do admire your attitude of not letting anything get in the way of your perseverance and determination to do the best job you can for patient care despite the slings and arrows from male doctors and other male health care givers. Your faith in yourself and acting upon it are inspiring. Thank you for sharing your story.
It is about being incredibly good , incredibly tough and incredibly determined. Those are the ground rules. You must go the extra mile.
So proud of you!
many have fought similar battles and have succeeded. For those in the midst of it, you are not alone! For those who wonder can I do it…Ofcourse you can! Believe in your self! And remember the ground rules.
You are very brave and you deserve our utmost respect. Having worked in the U.S, I, a single mom was never subject to the male insecurity that you describe among your male colleagues.
I will never choose to practice in India- particularly in North India, where the men are arrogant, disrespectful and unprofessional! I hope this male portrayal does not offend those men, who were raised to respect women!
You go Doc and prove them wrong!!
Bravo, for being persistent and resilient
Thank so much Dr Tandon for your perseverance and persistence – both at work and in your personal life. You are an incredible role model for your own children, as well as your extended family and friends. I imagine you have effected even more by the frustrations of the male colleagues and nursing staff, as I am sure they griped about you at home and other places as well, so wives, daughters and other women have had the benefit of knowing not only that it is possible, but you are good enough to make the men angry! I send many… Read more »
Well done!! You are an inspiration!!
Hey Shikha ,,you go girl
So proud of your acceptance of everything socially and ,professionally .and excelling at it.
Best wishes.
Harsha Sheth
California
I loved your article. Your comments about the “mountainous male ego” at the end of the 4th paragraph really had me laughing!!!
Brilliantly written and highly commendable career path. So proud to know of a Indian fellow female competent EM clinician. Well done and keep up the good work!
Way to go girl… Being from the same male dominated, patriarchal society that believes that men are the savior for all mankind, I can totally imagine what it would have been for you to work your way up to a ER physician. Beautifully written and good luck with that indomitable spirit
Love the article.. You are one brave lady. I have worked with Dr shikha I have gained a lot expreance from her. I got a huge respect for her..
Dr. Shikha you are such a strong woman !! Congratulations for all your accomplishments by far !! and wishes for many more successful ventures ahead.. You chose to be persistent and strong and sail through the turbulences and challenges which makes you an inspiration..You are a true example of saying ???????? “Don’t be pushed by your problems , be led by your dreams “.
She is strong indeed . Had privilege to work with her
Penning down your life in an article doesn’t end up your ambitious adventurous rollercoaster journey. What you have written is only a tiny blog but in reality its more than the ‘mountainous’ phase which you have lived all alone. I can only express my gratitude for having an opportunity to witness some of its glimpses. All my prayers for you only ask for your growth so that you keep inspiring people all around you specially ‘females’. Life must have been very brutal to you but God has been kind enough to bestow you with two beautiful twin boys who are… Read more »
Superb Shikha. Keep up the good work. May you grow even more in your career. Best Wishes
Dear All, firstly I would express my humblest gratitude that you all read this article and shared your precious views. The encouragement and support reflected from the comments posted has left me speechless! Hadn’t expected so much appreciation and support????????. I have shared a journey, in a very concise manner, that I took and chose to walk upon with a will to keep walking on it, how much ever I fell down and got injured. This required strength and perseverance which I unknowingly was inculcating inside me as I was blessed to be a mother admist all of it. Becoming… Read more »
Proud of u always
I am sure despite your hardships u will emerge winner . Keep on doing good work . My best wishes always .
Proud of u shikha.
Dr shikha , quite a journey, you are an epitome of success, Best of luck , you are an inspiration for others .
Good wishes n Regards
Aditya Singh
Superb!! So proud of you!!
What a pioneer! Great work Dr Tandon. Much love and support from a fellow female ER doc from Australia.
Great article Shikha.
Great doctor, nice person, a better friend.
Proud of you always.
Best wishes from UK
Proud of u Shikha
God bless u
Dr Shikha , I m proud of u . Working with u was previlge. I hope u r doing good today also. Best wishes .